Peanut Butter....I am Breaking Up With You!

Dear Peanut Butter,

My friend, we have had a great run!  I would meet you by the pantry with only a spoon.  I would scoop up that yummy goodness, and eat it right off the spoon!  I could stand there and eat an entire cup of you in one day!

I don't know what it is about you....the creamy texture, the way it coats my tongue, the feeling of bliss I feel when I eat it!

But there is a problem, and well.....its not you.....its me.

I sneak one spoonful, then another, then another.  When we go to make a ppj sandwich for my daughter, the jar is empty!  Then my daughter is not happy, and we all know, when my daughter is not happy....no one is happy!

Then there is the problem of the scale.  Right now it is not making too much of a difference, but if I keep this up, I will be having lots of problems with the scale.

I just can't quit you, peanut butter.  So I have to say good bye.

It may not be forever....there may be a time where I can have you in the pantry and not shovel you in, but now, I just can do it.

Thank you peanut butter.  Thank you for the time we had together, but for now I say....good bye!!

Love Always,

Me

Last Day of Week One

I am very happy to say that I am almost to the end of week one!  I am feeling great!  Happy even....

I was worried about this weekend.  My birthday was Friday, and I didn't want to go overboard.  I told my husband, no cake, no ice cream, no drinks, and when we go out for dinner, no apps or deserts!

I did fantastic!  We went to the movies with 2 other families, Rio 2, and although I had a large diet coke (which was more like a gallon), I ate my bar and that was it!  We went out to dinner, and I had a salad with no croutons and no bread!  Yea!

I have been weighing myself.  I am down 6 pounds today.  I started last Tuesday, but I am making Mondays my weigh in day, so I am saying 6 pounds lost for week one!  Yippee!!

Words can not even describe how glad I am that I went back on Medifast.  I feel in control, I feel happy, I feel encouraged!

I know I have a long way to go, but for the first time in a very long time, I know I can do it!

Made it to Day 3

Today is day 3 for me!  I have to say the most annoying thing is going to the bathroom so many times a day!  I have been getting in at LEAST 64 oz. each day.  I know I should have more, but I figure I will start at 64 oz. and go on from there.

I have been doing really good so far!  I am hungry....but it feels good to actually be hungry...not just thinking I am hungry.

I have noticed that some of the food has changed since I did Medifast 2 years ago.  The brownies are more of a cake, and the chili gets very pasty.  Both are still good....it is just different!  Today I am going to have the chicken flavored noodle soup for lunch.  That was one of my favorites!

I have also tried some new foods that were added since last time.  Mashed potatoes....YUM!!  The consistency is not quite like instant mashed potatoes, but they were still good!  It was nice to have something more savory.

Being able to focus on other things, and not spending a ton of time in the kitchen has been great!  I can be prepared for my day in just a few minutes, and I have all I need right in my pantry!  Filling my 64 oz. water bottle from the water cooler takes the most time!

Anyway, things are going well!  I am so glad I made this choice!

Day 1 Eve

I can't even tell you how I am feeling right now.

I am excited.  I am restless.  I am scared.  I am READY!!!

Tomorrow I am going back on the Medifast plan.  I spent the weekend eating, but also looking back at some of the blog I posted on the MyMedifast site.  I realized that I can lose the weight.  I can stick to a program.  I can do this!

I also spent some time looking at myself.  I know....it sounds weird, but I really looked at myself.  I have been living in a fantasy world.  In my head, I am not this size.  In my head, I look good!  The mirror tells a different story.  I can go on and on about my flaws, but what good is it going to do, except make me feel depressed?  I could tell you that my shadow was so huge, I couldn't believe it was me.  I could tell you that the rolls on my back are no longer rolls, but droops of fat.  I could tell you that my stomach is starting to be larger than my chest.  But I'm not.

What I am going to do is forgive myself.  I am going to forgive myself for the times I turned to food to make me feel better, or to hide from what I have been feeling.  I am going to forgive myself for having to buy a size 20 jeans, and shirts that are a 2x.

I forgive me.

I know this journey is not going to be easy.  I know I can not turn to food to solve my problems.  Tomorrow is the first step in a live long journey to being and staying healthy.

My order will arrive this afternoon.  Tomorrow I am going to start my day with coffee mixed with hot chocolate.  Yum!!!

So, good bye fat.  Good by negative feelings.  I forgive myself, and I have the courage to do this.

Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life!

Thoughts....

I am really looking forward to getting my Medifast!  I keep checking the tracking, and it is not due to arrive until Monday.  That means, I can not start officially until Tuesday.  I am using that time delay to make sure I am prepared!

I know that I need to have things on hand that I can make quickly and easily.  One of my favorite things when I was on Medifast before was cauliflower crust pizza!  I always had that when we ordered pizza!  It made me feel like I was having pizza too!  The only thing with it is that the protein is 1 c. of mozzarella cheese.  I will have it once or twice a week, and use eggs, chicken, and ground turkey for my "lean" for the rest of the week.

I need to get my "pizza" crusts ready this weekend, and put them in the freezer.  As we get closer, I will get some lettuce for salads (those are always quick meals!) and browse my favorite medifast sites to get some more ideas to have on hand.  I also have a file of recipes that I printed last time I was on this plan.

I am so ready for this!

It's Been A While.....and Good News!

I have been away from my blog.

During that time, I attempted to do Weight Watchers.  I really do believe it is a good plan, but it is just not working for me.

But, I do have some really exciting news!

I had to scrimp.....I had to save.....I had to promise my husband I will clean and organize my closet and drawers....but I just placed my first order at Medifast!!

I am so excited!

One of my problems has been making sure I am prepared for the day.  I need to have my food organized and prepared in order to be successful.  If I don't....bad things.  Very bad things!

On Medifast, all I will need to do is make sure I have my bars and packets ready to go!  Quick and easy!  I do have to make one meal...the Lean and Green.  But with two kids (husband not home at nights), a Lean and Green is a lot easier to make, and have them have it too!

I feel excited and in control....and I haven't even officially started yet!

One big problem will be next weekend.  It's my birthday.  But, I am going to give myself the best birthday present ever!  Good health!  Weight loss!!  Yea!!

So, I'm back and ready to make things happen!  Have a great week!